Unattended Sorrow

There were 12 of us got together to learn and discover what "unattended sorrow" is and have had a great conversation facilitated by Richard (Dick) West on Nov. 3, 2007.

The next CMI is scheduled on Dec. 15, 2007 and would like to invite you to share your own experience/stories of coaching and mentoring with whoever comes.

Looking forward to seeing you all there.

Your CMI coordinators,
Jessie and Neesha
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For whoever is interested, following is note prepared and shared by Dick. Enjoy learning about your own "unattended sorrow"....

UNATTENDED SORROW- WORKSHOP PROCEDURES FOR CMI 3 NOVEMBER 2007
CONTEXT FOR DISCOVERY: Read and dialogue over Stephen Levine's sentences from the book; Introduction and Chapter 1


UNATTENDED SORROW (US)

• The imprint of losses from the past, yet still painfully present, leads to depression and dysfunction. Long-unattended sorrows gradually shut us down as the weight of disappointment and unmet expectations are added
• This book's intent: help process grief in whatever way it shows up, before it affects consciousness below our level of awareness (avoiding anxiety, fear, anger that arise when we don't know why we feel the way we do.
• We don't know what to do with our pain and we never have
  Unattended Sorrow (US) weakens the body and divides the mind, keeping us from from being whole people
• US disturbs our sleep and poisons our dreams
• US holds back our intuition; we come to trust ourselves less, we withdraw, we feel numbness
• US often makes a relationship into a place to hide instead of an opportunity to open it leads to compulsiveness (busyness)
• US is like a low grade fever (body temperature)
• US pushes people towards addictions, a feeling of psychological heaviness, a deadness of spirit
• US narrows the path of our lives, causes us to lose heart, creates a lowering of trust in life itself
• Trying to protect ourselves from pain limits us and pushes away all that we love, leaving us isolated
• When we turn away from our sorrow, we increase our pain and close off parts of ourselves
• One of the great barriers to becoming whole again is doubt; powerless against our pain, we think we are stuck and can't move in any direction
• Kind investigation into our acceptance of powerlessness offers hope
• Rather than deflecting unpleasant feelings or memories, we can explore the possibilities of the heart one breath at a time
• Attending to this sorrow isn't going to make it all disappear, but it does begin to open up the heart that has room for it all
• Tapping the resources of the heart - the power to forgive, the strength to love, the trust to look deeper into what limits us - allows us to settle unfinished business
• As forgiveness dissolves the armor over our heart, we release the grief that's been held hard in the body
• When we soften layer after layer of the armor over our heart, we open to possibility of new life
• We reenter the body and mind through the heart